Its Ramadhan. The usual Ramadhan timetable is packed with extra prayers, daily visits to the mosque, and the fasting from sunrise to sunset. Its a special time, a time for focusing on your faith whilst spending much time in contemplation, meditation and deep supplication.
But for me this Ramadhan will be very different - and its not easy at the moment.
I cannot fast this year. Its hard because right now i feel well enough to - but its not something i should even consider whilst undergoing chemotherapy. The Quran has an injuction for those who are sick to fast when they are better instead. I will do this i guess, but its like i missing out on a huge chunk of what Ramadhan is all about.
Also i cannot really go to the mosque for prayers. As my immune system is lowered during the treatment i have been told to avoid crowded places to minimise the risk of picking up any sort of illness / infection as this can be quite serious.
This is quite suffocating really - but its the best way to go at the moment, i dont think ignoring the medical advice would benefit me in the long run.
What is sad is that it does not feel like Ramadhan. Its normally so busy and exciting and intense and spiritually charged, but not this time. Others in the home are not fasting either, in fact out of 6 of us there's just my two brother's that are fasting today. Strange.
Even if i cannot partake in the visits to the mosque and the fasting i can still benefit from this special time through spending more time in studying the Quran and religious books. As i am fascinated by this material anyway it sounds like an excellent plan.
As I recall, the niat is what counts. Allah makes it easy.
Allauakbar!
Posted by: AbuTM | September 14, 2007 at 01:39 AM