"At the age of 18 Delta Goodrem had everything going for her. In 2003 she was nominated for 10 Australian Record Industry association awards, the equivalent to the Brits. She'd had 5 number one singles at home in Australia and had also landed a major role in neighbours, and then in July of that same year she was diagnosed with Hodgkins Lymphoma and began treatment for the cancer. Well she's now in remission and released an album 'Mistaken Identity' in which she explores what she went through in the past 16 months."
(Taken from http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio4/womanshour/2004_48_tue_02.shtml)
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Remember her? The girl from neighbours who was also a pop star and actually could write, sing and play the piano? I had been told a while back that she too had had Hodgkins Lymphoma (by mush!) - but it wasnt until very recently that i looked further in to it. This coincided with my finding my copy of Delta's album 'Mistaken Identity' and also with me finishing chemo officially.
Only when going through the lyrics did i realise how many references to her diagnosis / illness / treatment are made throughout this album.
As she gets paid to put her feelings on paper its not surprising that the songs were filled with expressions and phrases i could relate 100% to, yet expressed in ways i could never come up with!
This is going to be a LONG post - i'll borrow Delta's words but all these words / thoughts / emotions i experienced too over the past 4 months of chemotherapy.
For the geeks amongst us i should say that Delta had the lymphoma in her neck and reading about the other symptoms she had id say she was either Stage IB or IIB.
1. Mistaken Identity
Chorus:
"The girl I used to be
Has a terrible case of mistaken identity
And yesterdays girl is not what you see
It’s a terrible case of mistaken identity"
Also:
"I was always walking one step ahead
Or so I thought until the monster crawled into my bed"
2. Be Strong
Although this was dedicated to someone else with a serious cancer you can tell Delta draws on her own personal experience. The whole song is relevant really:
"Are you swimming upstream, in notions of blue?
Do you feel like your sinking?
Are you sick of the rain, after all you've been through
Well I know what you're thinking.
When you can't take it, you can make it
Sometime soon I know you will see,
CHORUS
'Cause when you're in your darkest hour,
And all of the light just fades away.
And when you're like a single flower,
Whose colours have turned to shades of grey,
Well hang on
Be strong.
You're taking each step one day at a time,
You can't lose your spirit.
Well let live and let live,
Forget and forgive,
And it's all how you see it.
And just remember, keep it together
Don't you know you're never alone?
(Chorus)
No you're not defeated ohh
And soon you'll be smiling once again.
Then you won't have to feel it,
Let it go with the wind.
Time passes us by, and know that you're allowed to cry
(Chorus)"
3. Change
Super relevant one again - id change 'July 8th' for 'August 16th' below. She talks about this phase being 'frightening' but also 'so enlightening'.
"Change, like secrets in the wind I hear the whispers Madame butterfly
Spread your precious wings I watch you fly away
I know, I can't change fate of that July the 8th and it was never the same
I know, this stage is frightening but its oh so enlightening is this how karma goes
Who would have thought when chance came calling that this would be my defining story and who
Could have guessed on my life's journey I could find my way through this extraordinary day
Nothing is isolated
I know, I can't change fate of that July the 8th and it was never the same
I know, this stage is frightening but its oh so enlightening is this how karma goes
Extraordinary day
This would be my defining story
And who could have guessed on my life's journey I could find my way through this Extraordinary day"
4. Fragile
Speaks for itself entirely.
"Six thoughts at once I can't focus on one
Seven days a week but my life has just begun
So caught in emotion and I'm overcome
As I'm falling down I come undone
Chorus
Sometimes I feel like I'm alone
Sometimes I feel like I'm not that strong
Sometimes I feel so frail so small
Sometimes I feel vulnerable
Sometimes I feel a little fragile
A little fragile
In six thousand years what will this mean
Words from the heart or a melody
So caught in emotion and I'm overcome
As I'm falling down I come undone
(Chorus)
If people can see right through my eyes
Like an open door that I can't disguise
I won't be afraid from the tears I cry
I'll not run I'll not hide this is how I feel inside
A little fragile
A little fragile
(Chorus)"
5. Disorientated
This song has two choruses:
"Things are changing
So much arranging of my life
I must take hold
I'll keep on spinning until I find myself again"
"I'm disorientated
I'm trying not to be jaded
When it's all so complicated
'cause I'm a little disorientated "
Other good snippets about losing track of time and days..
"So I woke up and there's the moon
Seems to have risen just a little soon"
"So I woke up and there's the clock
It was ticking backwards had I forgot
But what day is it anyway"
